24 things Leslie told me:

1. I used to watch CSI and the Law & Orders but I had to stop because I just started seeing all the ways people could suck, and it made the world scary, which is no good for me because I generally am not a scared person, I sort of have a lot of faith in humanity but something like that is hard to hold on to – I think sometimes you have to work at being a believer in the good of man but thinking everyone sucks requires zero heavy lifting, if that makes sense. But that’s not who I want to be.

2. we got pizza in the middle of julian dibbell’s book party and drank beer on the street and he almost kissed me but my friend viv walked out the building door and interrupted it and we never got the moment bac k and i hoped typing that would make his name pop in my head but it didn’t work. he had a really soft coat. but unfortunate hair.

3. I actually really love a bunch of Steely Dan songs – Black Cow, Babylon Sister, Kid Charlemagne, and man, do I love Dirty Work. And don’t get me started on “Any major Dude.

4. It’s also weird no one mentioned your never ending quest for excellent beverages, vegetarianism, and how your writing has recurring themes of communication with the dead and blurring lines between imaginary things and real interactions. i also still know most of “when your mother was a spy byheart” though, so you know, I’m a bit ovbsessive with details.

5. we’re always ahead of the curve! he’s a turbodouche. I really feel like he should get the boot and we should change the list address. am i overreacting?

6. I have been ranting and raving about shit like this for YEARS and it’s getting grosser bythe minute. why create anything when we can define ourselves by what we consume? HATE HATE.

7. I’d like the chance to be disappointed by a kfan blowoff.

8. that would have to be one hell of a bunnypearl to have a shipping weight of 10lbs.

9. here are two things that cheer me up.

1. asian baby w. statue.
2. monkey in a bucket.

10. I have two space ghosts ad a brak show I refuse to delete in my tivo, and one of them has brak on coffee which is so kickass and makes me laugh so hard, but actually partly because it’s funny and partyly because ages ago I made paul ford watch it and he periodically calls me and does his version of brak on coffee. when he’s delighted by something, it’s one fo the most charming things ever.

11. I debated whether or not to mention this to you, but after you told me you took fiber every day even though it wasn’t technically necessary, I decided to give it a try, despite my lack of having any issues in that general theme. Anyway, it does make a difference for the better, I think, I actually feel a little better, and so I guess I want to say thanks, but what a super crazy ultra personal topic I’m nto at all comfortable with. I’m much more comfortable with explicit sexual conversations that this topic. Seriously it’s my least favorite thing, so I’m sorry to bring it up but thanks.

12. wow, no one ever asks me tv questions – let me think on it a minute. i want to say Golden Girls, but I know that’s not really right.

13. yahoo maps gets a few things around the city wrong – they also have bass ackwards directions to my parents house which was disappointing the time i flew home and drive around in a blizzard with no mobile phone trying to “surprise” them.

14. kevin, that’s so nice of you, thanks you so much! i really look forward to reading it. I am really attracted to stories like this, I love it when conventional wisdom is re-conceived into something that works differently and etc. etc. anyway, thank you so so much, i really appreciate it and look forward to reading it.

15. I like to rock out with my crock out.

16. all that’s missing is a locker combination and a homeroom.

17. also one thing that’s alwys infuriated me is that around the same time you and i have similar ideas but yours are always about a half inch better than mine and then i get frustrated and do nothing instead.

18. what happens, i think, ispeople get so afraid fo confronting on the legit issue theypuff it up with the stuff thatends up being needlessly hurtful and not what they intended, like they can muster the ire and strength shoot canonballs, but lobbing the tennis ball that’s littering thier yard over the fence is impossibly taxing.

19. I’m really a good little drug spotter, I can almost always tell what someone’s poison is by looking but that’s just flat out unsubtle heavy handed heroin what with the nodding out.

20. wow. that talked me out of the harp thing 100%.

21. her definition of fucking with whitey was to ask if you loved her? that’s kinda sweet, actually.

22. i don’t want to fight about fake meats.

23. as an aside. all oa sudden raimi looks more like a little person and less like a muppet. it’s both a little sad and a lot awesome when that happens. you know, before too long you’re going to have to deal with me visiting the you in person. with advance notice, of course. but i’m just saying, start warming up to the idea, please.

24. awesome, I’m glad he’s well. I’ve been wondering but I’m on my campaign not to be such a Yenta so I didn’t ask. I sent him an email about the project, anyway, thanks so much for the address.