The Location Scout is the story of a Hollywood Location Scout who one day gets offered a job with the Witness Protection Program. He travels the world identifying locations in order to help people get where they need to be. The Location Scout knows the entire planet like the back of his hand. Then one day he realizes he has no idea where he is.

The Location Scout is a story about choices and uncertainty and being lost and finding your way in the world.

Steve Himmer says:

I really enjoyed The Location Scout – it certainly felt complete as it was, but I would have loved to keep reading and to stay in that world longer. I loved the sense of a whole world of people in hiding, and that the metaphor wasn’t overdone – lots to think about, without being told WHAT to think about, and I always enjoy that in fiction.

Josh Allen says:

[D]on’t quote me on this, but I think — MAYBE — I think maybe Location Scout is my favorite thing you’ve written.

I first mentioned this book on my tumblr a week or 2 ago. It was sold-out for a little while but I have some more copies now. The reviews are starting to come in on Goodreads and basically people seem to like it.

This is a self-produced affair, 1/2 size, 12pp. About 3000 words. The original idea came to me in August 2008; the bulk was written between October 2008 and February 2009.

SOLD OUT I’M SORRY. Still available for the Kindle, and PDF version coming soon.

My story “What It Meant To Be The Universe” was published by Monkeybicycle.

My story “The Cutest Thing Ever” is in Narwhal Magazine this week.

I mean I guess at some point there must have been, what, a blogger? a poet? who wrote something about the moon and the tides. About the thing he loved or desperately wanted being continually pulled out of reach. Like: the moon was life, or forces outside of his control. And he was the beach, or a person on the beach, at least. And the ocean was a girl, or a beloved pet, or the thrill of being the first person to blog about a funny video. Whatever.

I don’t know. I’ll A9.com it when I get back to civilization.

Here’s what happens: every day at the beach there is a skinny teenage girl in a bikini. She’s out there in the water with her friends, and she screams for the boys each time she gets hit by wave. She’s in the water. She sees the waves. She stands there, gets hit, screams.

Taken to its logical conclusion, she’ll be screaming for one thing or another her whole life.

But I guess we all will.

I think we can all easily agree that the cutest thing ever is a kitten hugging a rabbit, up in a tree, and they are scared because they don’t know how to get down, but at least they’ve got each other. We see this and think: Yes.

But if we pause, and take a step back, we realize that this is really only the cutest thing on the internet.

Some differences between real life and the internet:

• the types of harm that may befall you;
• the likelihood of someone you’ve never met using false accusations to destroy your will;
• the durability of your force field;
• your ability to breathe.

Maybe another idea for the cutest thing ever is when you are asleep in bed, and in the middle of the night the gray things come bending down out of the walls, slowly lowering their vapory torsos until their faces are hovering just inches from yours. And they sway and stare at you for hours, covering you like a writhing fog all night, and they would never touch you or try to wake you, even if you were in danger.

Which is to say: who is to say.

Which is to say: the night is not a metaphor. The night is what it always has been: a time of utter darkness. And look: in this darkness, the universe becomes illuminated.

Some differences between the night and the internet:

• the night has teeth, but they are often hidden;
• the internet has teeth, but they are often imaginary;
• the internet wants your spirit, and will die without it;
• the night is patient.

The internet can have it. The internet can has whatever it wants. The night is agnostic about the internet.

When you wake, you and I will be that kitten and that rabbit. And the tree will be the rattling binary of the internet. And how to get down will be wait until night. Let the day wash over you until all that is left is the universe.